3 Steps to Less Drama
Have you ever noticed that drama seems to follow some people? Did you ever stop to consider why that is? Perhaps it's you and you're wondering why you find friends, only to be left a year or two later wondering what happened... In this post, I'll discuss 3 ways to help with these things!
Step 1. Assume Good Will. The truth: Most people are not thinking about you. The average person is going about their daily lives, managing the millions of details that we all handle, juggling children, schedules extended family and hopefully some school and marriage bliss. We all bump along and sometimes we have minor collisions. A look that seemed off, a thoughtless word or an unexpected schedule change. 9 times out of 10, these actually have nothing to do with you as a person. These things just happen and the person was not thinking of ways to hurt you, they just did accidently (if you let it hurt.) The key is to stop and reconsider - was this actually about ME... (nope.) Then give grace, choose to love and move on with your day.
Step 2. Relational Integrity. What if something really did feel directed at you? Simply put - Go to the person directly. It's understandable to need to verbally process, but this only takes one conversation with someone who is not involved, and even better if they don't know the other friend. Then it's time to go straight to the person you are feeling hurt by - with the desire to reconcile.
Step 3. Remain curious. This is the concept of humble question asking. Always - there are circumstances you do not know - ALWAYS. (Even in marriage!) So when you go to someone with something on your heart or mind - start with you. State how you're feeling and then ask, what happened? How were they feeling? Was there something you missed or didn't know about. Ask the questions with the understanding that you can change.